Tuesday, 16 March 2010

Story Idea 1: The Oafish Broomstick

The story is about a teenage broom who wont and cant do what his dad ask of him:

Act One:

The scene opens with the Father broom shouting at his son because he cant do what he is told. The father is tiny compared to his son and has to look up at him.. He then attempts to show his son how to actually sweep up properly. He then tells his son he has one last chance, otherwise he will be locked in the storage cupboard..

Act Two:

The son then goes off to try his luck again. He first starts to sweep up the dust like a normal broom. But then gets bored and sweeps all of the dust under a rug, and then sweeps all of the rubbish into a cupboard.. Thinking he has outsmarted his dad.. But he finishes too quickly and his dad realizes something is wrong...

Act Three:

The dad goes to inspect the work. Spotting a little bit of dust near the rug, pulling it back to reveal the large amount of dust.. Thinking thats it he, gets angry and is about to shout at the boy when he hears something from behind the cupboard. As he moves closer the door bursts open, burying him in rubbish.. The scene closes on the father closing the storage door on the boy..

1 comment:

  1. Hi Matt,

    I think you need to simplify and return to your word: Oafish, as your interpretation of it being disobedient etc. isn't broad or visual enough.

    A adjective
    1 boorish, loutish, neanderthal, neandertal, oafish, swinish
    ill-mannered and coarse and contemptible in behavior or appearance; "was boorish and insensitive"; "the loutish manners of a bully"; "her stupid oafish husband";

    Your broom needs to be this cumbersome character that makes more of a mess than it tidies - like a bull in a china shop...

    Homer Simpson is oafish
    Bluto from Popeye is oafish

    Let your broom blunder about for comedic effect - steer clear of dialogue too...